river of dreams

Yesterday didn't turn out to be as hectic as I anticpiated. I also started to get very tired, more like a haze of exhaustion.
I was uber uber excited yesterday because when I went home I had mail!!! From actual people I know rather than bills or random grad school packets.
First I got a graduation announcement from a friend in school. And then I got a letter from the nicest people. My mom and I met them at the Thanksgiving parade and hit it off based on the fact that we were from Virginia (at some point.) We talked the whole parade and they were so wonderful. The mom wanted to send me some pictures that she had taken at the parade so I gave her my address.
So she sent the pictures on a CD as well as a $20 gift card to Starbucks!!! It made me so happy and giddy and immediately perked me up.
I was then in a chatty mood so I attempted to call some friends all of whom were too busy to talk. Oh loneliness, so I went to the grocery store to get some Jones soda to maintain the cheer I felt.
I'm reading this book right now called Beyond the Ivory Tower: Social Responsbilities of the Modern University. It's sorta dry but still really interesting.

I feel like I'm becoming more and more awkward. Like I'm losing my social skills and ability to connect to people. This could be a figment of my imaginiation. It's even slightly ironic since now, more than ever, I know and have much more in common with a wider social network. But still I feel like I'm retreating and becoming a more introverted person. But I guess that's part of the ebb and flow of life. And maybe this is the point I'm supposed to be at in my life. In a sort of personal retreat to learn more about my own ambitions and needs. But I wish I could do that while still having regular deep conversations with friends.

I feel very tired today which allows me to focus more on the minute things that I always avoid like doing timesheets or building structure under the big ideas I have. When I have too much energy I can't get anything done, so this is nice.