wonderful time of the year

So I've spent the past three days in such bliss. I feel so rested ahh I can't even explain. Even though I've still had to work at Lush it hasn't been that bad. I also have been going through my phone calling people I haven't touched bases with in a while. WOW! I forgot how many wonderful people I know. There are also a couple of people who have been going through the same challenges I have and I wish I had touched bases with them earlier. Anywho it has been wonderful.

I am enjoying my days although I had a loop dream that I missed my train for Christmas. It leaves at 4:55 tomorrow morning. I need all the good Karma I can get to make sure I can get up and to the train station at that time.

Merry Christmas all!!

lessons that will help in the new year

THE SIX TENSIONS OF LEADING CHANGE
The idea is to find a balance between these

I.
Catalyze change
Champion an initiative or a significant change, consistently promote it, and encourage others to get on board.
vs.
Cope with transition
Recognize and address the personal and emotional aspects of change.

II.
Show a sense of urgency
Demonstrate the need to take action; accelerate the pace of change.
vs.
Demonstrate realistic patience
Know when and how to slow the pace so that people can cope and adapt.

III.
Be tough
Make difficult decisions without hesitation or second-guessing.
vs.
Be empathetic
Take others' perspectives into account; understand the impact of your actions and decisions.

IV.
Show optimism
See the positive side of any challenge; convey that optimism to others.
vs.
Be realistic and open
Speak candidly about the situa¬tion, and don't shy away from dif¬ficulties; admit personal mistakes.

V.
Be self-reliant
Be confident in your ability to handle new challenges.
vs.
Trust others
Be open to others' input and sup¬port; allow them to do their part.

VI.
Capitalize on strengths
Know your personal and organizational strengths; confidently apply them to new situations and circumstances.
vs.
Go against the grain
Show willingness to learn and try new things--even when the process is difficult or painful.

Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn't you - all of the expectations, all of the beliefs - and becoming who you are. Rachel Naomi Remen

what you learn when you burn

Ha. The past few days have been good.
I wanted to read a few passages from the Bible but could not
find mine. So I read the next best thing, my journal. Oohhh hope that isn't sac-relig. But there were some startling insights. I mean Startling, with a capital S. One was a note I had written to myself about how to deal with difficult situations:
Ask, How can I use this experience to become the kind of person my soul longs to be?
How can I use this lesson so that others can learn from me and maybe bypass a difficult life experience? How can I use this incident to heal my own heart? How can I use this lesson to help the healing of the planet?
Deep I know, but I hope to continue to reflect on those questions. Oh the lessons I've taught myself.

I need to go home and clean a little but I ventured out to get some fresh air. I've had enough, back to my little home.

home

This has been such a year, when I think about it all I breath a deep sigh looking forward to 2009. I have so much to learn, so much to learn...

Here are some thoughts though from other NSPers about their experience with our organization. I know I'm probably being gusy but one day I'll look back and I want to not only remember how happy I felt I want it to inspire me again.

from Jordan
A lot was said in the election about Community Organizing. It seemed to be the single most life-changing, perspective-giving part of President-elect Obama's life. It has really been hitting me that, while it may not feel that profound every second of every day to me, that we are all doing the exact same thing. The reason it is my biggest priority to connect with all of you more is that we are all embarking on what is probably going to be the most profound, life-changing experience of our entire lives. We are all going to go on to do different and amazing things, but I am sure that this time of service for all of us will be seen as one of the biggest moments of our lives. I am honored to be sharing it with all of you.
***CONTINUED FROM ABOVE***-Since I began in the NW Philly office almost 5 years ago, I loved the work of NSP. However, what completely captivated me and made me a life-long NSPer was when I went to my first national training (SD 2005 training) and, what was back then the August conference, and got to meet and experience the people. The people of NSP are some of the most amazing on Earth. You all are naturally bright, funny, intelligent, witty, passionate, enthusiastic, energetic, compassionate, sensitive, kind, caring, cool, hardworking, and utterly smart. You all have chosen to value people, live with integrity, fight for justice, treat others with dignity and respect, spread awareness, and serve others. To be honest, I did not know that people like you existed before I found NSP and I still have yet to meet your equals in any other setting. The fact that I am able to be around people like you is such a great thing for me and the fact that people like you have accepted me as one of your own is the greatest honor of my life. Although I have not been in constant communication with all of you, please know that I love and respect each and every one of you to the highest degree and am truly honored to work and serve with you. You all are such an inspiration to me and I thank you for everything that you are.

If you have made it this far, I am eternally impressed and grateful have your back forever. Just call on me and I'll be there.

from Laura

I am continually inspired and amazed by everyone in NSP. I can't imagine any other organization where I would feel so supported, valued, challenged, and fulfilled on a daily basis, and where I would have such respect and admiration for everyone I have the honor of working with. In starting to think about next year, this has become all the more clear. I've decided though that I'm not going to get stressed about the future, because that would take away from being fully present in every day that I'm here at NSP. You have all given me a lot to be grateful for, and I hope you all have most wonderful, happy, healthy, and safe holidays!

from Colin
I can’t tell you how thankful I am for being able to work at NSP. Everyday I hear horror stories of people who dislike their job, their co-workers, (not to mention those that are unable to find work) and I’m reminded of just how lucky I am. I can honestly say that I love and enjoy every person at NSP (how they keep bringing great people into the organization is beyond me) and love my job and the difference I’m able to make in individuals lives, from clients to volunteers, and to the larger community. Very few people can say that.

Don't stop believing...

One who loves you the most

I found these awesome pictures of our awesome group...

gray room

My desk is crazy!!! This has been such a task filled week but at least it has made the days go by faster. Since this is our last week open there have been a lot of things to get turned in, loose ends to get wrapped up, e-mails to send out, meetings to attend, volunteers to appreciate and of course making sure our clients have access to resources while we're gone.

Yesterday was our Local Adivsory Board meeting which was very successful and well attended by all of our board members. Our LAB is made up of members of the Philadelphia community who advise us on the role of our office in relation to the issues affecting the Philadelphia community. I'm consistently amazed by our student leaders and the amount of vision and tenacity they have. Sarah our Local Director from the West also attended the meeting and shared some of the work she has been doing on community resources in the West community with Dr. Harkavy at Penn.

We also had some great discussions about the issues in Philadelphia that will affect our services in our office. Case managers at local homeless shelters are being let go because of budget cuts. The Case managers are the staff members at homeless shelters that assist residents in getting their lives back togethers. Essentially we are going to see more people going into the homeless shelters with less to no people assisting them move out of them. While this is very discouraging it shows that our services are going to be even more essential in this time of need.

A similar issue resulted in some intense discourse back and forth with our leadership team. I had recently read an article about the lack of guidance counselors in Philadelphia schools and the affect this was having on college attainment for Philly high school students http://www.philly.com/philly/news/local/36121124.html. We had a discussion about what if any service we could be in this time. Especially since the system that we use to sign people up for public benefits is adding a FAFSA application. One of our site coordinators didn't feel like it was really our place or the best use of our skills but at our LAB meeting a couple of our board members brought up the same issue and suggested that we provide some services. I was relieved to hear some more support for our at least developing some resource energy to it but it was a tense moment. It made me wonder, should I speak up about issues that I am passionate about and find relevant or just hold back to avoid making ripples that might cause too much discomfort. In the end, if it helps us become more effective at serving the needs of the Philadelphia community, I'd have to go for speaking up...

I had some tear jerkers of client meetings. Since we've been a little slower I've had time to sit down and really talk to my clients and learn more about the stories that brought them to our office. I always wrestle with revealing client stories even if I don't include their names but in summary I can say that the routes that bring our clients here is a maze of bad decisions, bad luck, an unforgiving system and last hope. I feel like that scene in the Grinch where his heart grows beyond its size. I feel like my ability to love and care and not judge has grown much beyond what I've been capable of. I don't think I've been surprised much by what I've seen pertaining to bureacracy and the issues of the poverty. Although my understanding has deepend greatly and I've learned much more about the human aspect. The faces behind the statistics. I've grown from that.

I've also learned so much from the wonderful organization I'm apart of. Work within our regional team has been tense at times but that's to be expected in a field where passions run high and everyone seems to come in with a mission and a vision, unprepared to compromise or collaborate. But we all have a heart for our clients and have proven that there are different ways to support the community and the work we do. I've also taken sometime to go through all of our vols feedback and learn what we can better do to support them because, well, they are the ones that do client service and its important that we reach down from our clouds of ideas and jobs to give the information to our vols so that that information will reach our clients who could care less about our disagreements.

I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world although I do miss my friends and family. I'm very excited about the Holiday and break.
I don't think I've ever made a New Years resolution but if I was to make one it would be to work more on what I found is important to me, the people in my life. To stay in touch more and learn more from them, even the ones I don't really care that much for.

Besides, does any of us really know what we're doing...

Merry Christmas!

I'll share a quote from one of my vols:

One day while looking for jobs, I was beginning to join client in his momentary discouragement, feeling as though everything was out of my hands, feeling under the full weight of the realization that there is only so much NSP and me personally as a volunteer can do. Out of nowhere, client received a call asking him to come in for an interview the next day, and he was elated. I was so, so thankful for client's upcoming opportunity and replenished enthusiasm. I feel like this experience with client has been incomparably formative to my dedication to the NSP organization.

For the Holidays please join me in supporting NSP and the work we're doing, it's becoming even more necessary. Now more than ever....http://www.nspnet.org/donate/index.htm

Song: High and Dry by Radiohead
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCPDiEz-GcE

round and round and round we go

Do not worry if you have built your castles in the air. They are where they should be. Now put the foundations under them. Henry David Thoreau.

I have knots in my stomach thinking about the amount of things that need to be checked of my to do list by the end of this week. But (deep breath) it's all going to be ok.

I had a stressful time in the beginning of the year learning to work with some members in my regional team. Although I don't doubt that I work with pessimists, I also am sure that I tend to throw ideas out there like pennies towards a wishing fountain, with this naive idea that people will be as excited about them as I am and want to join in. This was not the case and after repeated events of my ideas not only being turned down but picked apart piece by piece I become quite frustrated and passive.

Lesson learned. You have to fight for your ideas if you believe in them and you have to be willing to be flexible and learn from others who may know more than you. But if you really believe that something is important, you've got to find a way to make it work. I mean if its reasonable and all. I'd rather fail with a good idea then sit wondering what if and feeling as if I contributed nothing. I am reminded of that Thoreau quote above. There's a way to make it work and I can't just assume that everyone knows more than me about things, while still being humbled by the fact that I don't know everything.

I've got a very active beginner's mind that's undaunted to the looming obstacles ahead and willing to try anything at least once. It's apart of me, but not all of me. Either way let's see if I can make it work.