The most wonderful thing just happened. And I so confused by it, so grateful and wondering what I can to do to repay such a kind gesture.
So Ainsley is a friend of my uncles and was reminded by everyone to get in contact with him as soon as I got up here. And I did but I have this sinking suspicion that my uncle did some behind the scene work and asked Ainsely to help me out because he knew I would never ever ask. So Ainsley took to me to Target today so I could pick up some stuff and I just thought he was being nice and giving me a ride but he ended up buying me all this stuff for my apartment. He was really sneaky about it and it wasn't until he dropped me off at my apartment, opened his trunk and gave me all this stuff and I was like OMG. I was so happy because I did really need a lot of those things.
I feel so grateful. And I hope that I showed him I was open. Sometimes I can put up this wall of 'don't help me I can do it myself' and I don't let people know what I really need and it frustrates them. But I don't want to be a burden.
There are a lot of emotions, I journaled about them but for the most part I'm just really thankful. It was such a wonderful and kind gesture.

So that's been the most active part of my day. I did some cleaning around here and got stuff semi organized. I look forward to getting furniture and feeling more at home, but everything in its own time.
I'm very very grateful, and so happy.

Song: (This song doesn't really relate to the post except that it makes me really energetic, and I dance to it a lot) Leave a light on by Belinda Carlisle http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgNwS52-Iy4

Quote: (Don't have one but this video makes me laugh so hard I cry)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Na70-2wv79A

food prices, welfare and nutrition

So I've still been working on my research of the rise in food prices, the effects on those on food stamps and the feasibility of nutritious meals. I found these really interesting articles.

'Food costs likely to boost obsesity in poor.'
http://www.philly.com/philly/news/homepage/18680929.html
This article reiterates what I had said about Aldi's and also includes some interesting statistics.

'Soaring use of food stamps, anothers sign of lean times.'
http://www.philly.com/inquirer/home_region/20080509_Soaring_use_of_food_stamps_another_sign_of_lean_times.html

'When ends don't meet.'
http://www.citypaper.net/articles/2008/05/08/when-ends-dont-meet

I found all of these articleso on the Greater Philadelphia Coalition against Hunger website, here:
http://www.hungercoalition.org/index.html

Still looking into some more resources. Keep you updated.

ordinary people

Synopsis of my fourth of July:

All you can eat ice cream festival

Shaking hands with the Mayor while also annoying his secret service

VIP seats at the John Legend concert

Reminding this nice old man of his daughter who died three months ago

Getting rained on ALL night

Rushing home in the rain and through the smelly subways and dirty streets before the city became a madhouse

Realizing I'm not a college student anymore, I'm a single girl in the city.

Okay so it was a pretty good day, excpet for the night. I really had to remember that I'm all alone and as much as I wanted to stay and watch the fireworks it was a much better idea to try to get home before they started because people were getting drunker and crazier and sketchier. Fortunately, I live in University City (Penn's made up name for the area they inhabit that they so desperately want to be distinguished from the rest of West Philly) so there were plenty of night police on every corner.

So yeah after eating enough ice cream to make me physically sick I went over to Ben Franklin Pkwy to find seats for the parade. I also wanted to catch the John Legend concert so I went all the way to the front and ofcourse everything was blocked off with heavy security. All of us could see that in front of the stage there was a ton of seating but we were told by the guards that it was VIP. Then all of these shfancy people started showing up with VIP tickets and were lead in. Oh how I wanted to be VIP. You couldn't see anything on the outside of the fence. But I just kept thinking, maybe they'll give away extra tickets at some point. About 45 mins after the thought and right before the parade started a woman walked up to me and said "Do you want tickets to the concert?" Psshh, do you even have to ask, then she pulled out a whole stack and handed out like 20. I got to go seat right in front so that was awesome.

Before the concert and parade Mayor Nutter came out and just started shaking people's hands. I was uberexcited cause I've been reading so much about him and it was cool to finally see him. But of course right after he shook my hand I dropped my ticket right between his feet. He nicely picked it up and handed it back to me but I got some pretty annoyed looks from his secret service and some other guy. Akward turtle.

The concert was awesome and I had great seats. The story with the man and daughter thing is too lenghty, sad and elaborate to put here but he was really nice and let me sit under his umbrella after it started raining.

At times it was just weird being by myself. I didn't mind but it would've been cool to have someone to share that day with. Plus the city can be really unnerving when you're a girl all by yourself as I've already learned.

So it was a good day but I remember now why I have never cared much for large cities and I look forward to just taking it easy at home tomorrow.

Another cool thing is that I know this city so well now that I can give people directions. That's pretty awesome. I'm off for some much needed sleep time. Here are some pictures from the concert and of city hall at night which is my favorite building in Philly.

Song: Ordinary People by John Legend

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jQ4jO4AwFY

Quote: The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well that's just fabulous. Carrie from Sex and the City

we are family

At my high school graduation our salutatorian gave a speech on family. He talked about the family that we are a part of biologically or otherwise, and then the family we choose. I went to a small high school (130 kids) and we def. considered ourselves a family. Well I sent out my weekly report yesterday over the list-serv and I got all of these wonderful e-mails from my coworkers saying "welcome to the NSP family" which really gave me this warm fuzzy feeling. Just hearing the way that both Alex ans Shawn talk about the organization makes me excited because they are very closeknit, there is a lot of support and it is very much a family feel.

Then when I got home I got a couple phone calls from the other part of my family, the biological one. It's always great to hear from them (thank you guys). Every since my mom got sick I've had to learn to let people care. Both my aunt and uncle kept saying how they knew things were hard but they would get better. My instant reaction is too always say that I'm perfectly fine which I've learned has always thrown people off. But I do believe I'm fine. Maybe not in this moment but overall I see ahead and I know that this moment is only a part of a larger moment. They are working together for some great good. I trust the process and I trust God and I know that things will work out well (Jeremiah 29:11). I don't worry, I'm fine.

For me worry is indicative of a self-abosrbed attitude. Maybe not for others but when I find myself getting worried or anxious that's when I know I'm spending too much time focusing on myself. I'm focusing on what I can do or what I can't without ultimately realizing that most things are out of my control. I can do what I can and then I must just be patient and have faith.

Jamie, a great counselor and in many ways a great friend, reminded me months ago that I have to learn to listen and trust my inner voice and truth. And from that I've learned that when I focus on my inner voice and truth I am constantly at peace because that inner truth knows that nothing, good or bad, can last forever. That "all things work together for good" and I am in really good hands.

So I am very happy to be a part of this new family and the adventures we will have together. Here's a link to some pictures taken at the NSP Jubilee to honor the AmeriCorps site coordinators this past June. Some of them we'll be leaving, but I'll meet some of them at our training at the end of the month. The pictures were taken at the Lodal Ranch which is this gorgeous place where I get to do part of my training and have other fun. http://tbrunswick.smugmug.com/gallery/5318130_oG4nt#324747583_4pmYn
Enjoy, Happy Fourth!

Song: Hands by Jewel

Quote: I look at the Augustem, and I think that perhaps my life hs not actually been so chaotic, after all. It is merely this world that is chaotic, bringing changes to us all that nobody could have anticipated. The Augusteum warns me not to get attached to any obsolete ideas about who I am, what I repersent, whom I belong to, or what function I may have once intended to serve. Yesterday I might have been a glarious monument to somebody, true enough-but tomorrow I could be a fireworks depository. Even in the Eternal City, says the silent Augusteum, one must always be prepared for riotous and endless waves of transformation. Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

Pumped.
That was exactly how I felt when I left the office today.
But the day didn't start off that way. The morning was really slow. Alex broke out in some horrible rash and also had some trouble downloading the training stuff for the day, so I leafed through some manuals and oriented myself with some of the organizations in Philly that we work with.
After lunch Alex went over the training stuff and I learned the NSP approach to working with clients. Our work is a lot like that of a social worker and our training materials and approach to client services were designed by social workers. It's pretty intense. But I love our approach because it's strength based( meaning we work with the clients to focus thier energy's on what they do well and teach them how to utilize it) and we work on building relationships with our clients which is pretty awesome. But of course that meant I went through a lot of training today on boundaries; how to make them and why they're important.
I'm horrible with boundaries but just looking through my training stuff, this job is going to absorb my life, energy and time and if I don't have those boundaries it can only equal an unhealthy relationship with the people I'm working with and myself.
But oh boundaries.
I also had to do my weekly report. That's cool because all the site coordinators and summer directors send one out so you can see what's going on with the other offices and get to know who other people are.

Okay so what got me pumped was today I was all the way downstairs when I realized I had left my tupperware in the fridge and they throw everything out on Friday and it's the only one I got. So I rushed back up there and ran into Kevin. Who's sort of our landlord. I don't know if I mentioned this but we are in one of the largest and most respected social services building in the city. Meaning there are a lot of organizations in the building doing things like us, namely "helping people help themselves." For example on one of the floors there is a charter school for young peope who have dropped out of school but want to go back and get their diploma. The program works with them and provides other support systems. They have also have AmeriCorps workers down there which is pretty cool. Anyway I ran into Kevin and started telling him more about the organization and it's great because there are so many opportunities in this relationship. Like he's been trying to figure out how to get Temple volunteers in the building (the students we work with) and we're looking for new members of our board and he might have some connections. Anyway me Alex and Shawn are going to meet with him on Monday so he can let us know who else is in the building. So Pumped.

In other good news some other things in my life are finally working out. The girl who was going to sublease my apartment before she fell off the place of the earth finally got back to me. Sadly her mother had died and she's in Africa and she had sent the rent but sent it to the wrong address so it came back to her. My landlord has been on my case and I really didn't know what to do so I'm happy that will finally resolve itself, somewhat.

Tomorrow is the fourth. Philly has been celebrating since last Saturday but tomorrow there's going to be all sorts of stuff like all you can eat ice cream , a parade, free John Legend concert and ofcourse fireworks. I'm excited.
Yesterday night I got really homesick. It wasn't abrupt but yesterday as I finished unpacking my box I just got a little sad. But I think I know what it is. I mean I go to work, come home, run errands, cook/eat dinner and then crash. Then I wake up and do it again. I gotta get out more and really enjoy and love this city. So today after work I came to the Green Line Cafe which is just a couple streets over from me. It's nice to be out of the apartment. I think next weekend I'll go to the Jersey Shore and visit Jess.

OKay, so ofcourse I'll keep you updated but tata for now.

Oh wait I almost forgot. So I might have to go on food stamps so I was doing some research and I found this article about a challnege to Philadelphia residents to live as if they're on food stamps to bring awareness of the challenges facing families on food stamps right now, might be interesting. Check it out.
http://www.philadelphiaweekly.com/view.php?id=12595

Now bye.

Song: Green by Sister Hazel

Quote: From what we get, we can make a living; what we give however makes a life.Arthur Ashe

walking on sunshine

I enjoyed today.
I try to enjoy everyday but somedays are just easier than others.
I'll start with the most recent event.
I finally got one of my boxes. My mom is shipping them up periodically. I was so excited when I walked in and saw it sitting there in the entranceway. I jumped up and down. It's all my pots and pans and kitchen stuff so I can cook things to eat. And my comforter and some random things my mom threw in there. Yet, it was so much more than just getting some stuff. It was like a piece of me was coming back. It was like seeing an old friend. All of this familiar stuff and it just made me feel like I was home again, and it was the best feeling I felt in a long time. It was just the familiar. I mean I enjoy my studio but there is this feeling of home that is missing and it's good to have that here.

Event two. Today when I was coming home I realized I wanted mustard. Here's the deal I live in the vicinity of four food marts. One is on 40th and Walnut right on the edge of Penn's campus. The fresh grocer. It's like a step down from Whole Food meaning it's really nice, health food, other food, organic, and somewhat high prices.
Then there is shop and bag which is across the street from me on 44th and Walnut. It's like three steps below Winn Dixie, which means small selection, interesting quality of food, but fairly ok.
There is also the produce truck. No irony, that's exactly what it is. It's fresh amazing produce at really low prices. I got three grapefruits and a bag of carrots for two dollars. You just can't beat that.
And finally, there is the once mysterious Aldi on 46th and Market. It's right at the place where I get off the subway so I decided to stop there. By golly, it was like a mecca of fakebrand and frozen and low priced junk food. You know how instead of cheerios there's roundy honey o's or instead of hellman's mayo there's like spellman's mayo. It was all of that at ridicously low prices. I got mustard three frozen burritoes and a bag of frozen french fries for three dollars.
At first I was really happy about the new found cheap food options. But then I began to wonder.
Even though it was really cheap and just plain awesome, the stuff in there was poor quality and high sugar and low nutritional value. Most of the people in there were large minority families. I instanlty began to wonder what the health statistics in the community were like obesity rates, pregnancy issues, major illness and life expectancy. I mean I live at the poverty level now, these options are great for me. It just isn't as accesible to godown to fresh grocer and get organic health food. 30 cent frozen burritos sound great tome.
I mean is there a way to make healthy, quick food accesible. But I mean if you have all of these other issues going on in your life and you've never really placed a value on the nutritional content of your food?
And I need to be aware, that what I value are not the norm and my fellow community members have the same convictions such as loving their family and taking care of their needs but just go about in different ways.
But as a country I feel we stress how important it is too eat healthy but are we making it accesible for everyone? And if given the choice would people even choose anything than what they know?
I wonder.

Today was a more productive and fulfilling day at work. I had my first official conference call with my boss, Delese, and Alex and Shawn. We talked about the new office space and some logistical stuff. NSP is a really great organization, and I'm beginning to feel really committed to it. Our meeting went well and then we worked on getting the computers set up and I got my new e-mail and then it was the day. Tomorrow we're doing outreach and a tour of the community.

Now to cook dinner.

I don't really know how to begin this post.
I started off with, "Yesterday was my first day. I liked it. I'm really excited.I'm a walrus."
I can hear my 11th grade English teacher Mrs. Koszoru blasting my now about my use of simple sentences.
Yesterday was a great day though. I did start my job and I can tell I will thoroughly enjoy it. I felt so grown up. Waking up yesterday morning was a breeze. Knowing that I was waking up to go to this job which I was so excited to start rather than some class on the theory of human identity, you can't buy that feeling.
Yesterdy consisted mainly of moving into our new office space. I learned more about this organization and my responsibilities by leafing through some old papers and reading ourNational impact reports.
I love the people I work with because we're all so different and bring such different perspectives to the table. It will be exciting troubleshooting. Our office has many challenges, including recruiting volunteers and "difficult" clients. Ive already heard from Alex (former site coordinator) and Shawn (my-co) that I will learn so much. In fact, Shawn noted that he learned more here than in college. Well we will see.
So I'm in that training phase, taking it all in. I'll learn about community resources in North Philly, how to work with our clients, Temple and other universitites in the area, National NSP stuff. It's all good.
I also love this independence thing of getting to work on my own and living on my own, and sorta kinda being financially independent. Yesterday I came home and I went to the grocery store and CVS to run some errands. Errands. Feel like I'm playing dress up or something.
Anywho I have to get ready for work and pack a lunch and then be off. Farewell for now.

Song: 9-5 by Dolly Parton

Quote: Ok don't forget to pick up some mace. Mom.